11/11


Åtte år etter, er sorga litt meir til å bera. Eg treng ikkje halda alt på avstand. Eg kan gje meg sjølv lov til å ta fram kjenslene og sjå at det gjer vondt utan at det riv meg sund. Iallfall ikkje heilt sund.

I dag har eg vore på grava

. Eg tente ljos og la att ein liten nett krans av bar og blomar som ei jente på blomsterbutikken batt for meg, akkurat slik eg ville ha han. Men det var ikkje slik denne dagen eigentleg skulle vera. Ein skal ikkje ha “bursdag” for ungane sine ved ein gravstein.

Mamma skreiv i ettertid eit dikt om korleis ho såg meg utanfrå den gongen for 8 år sidan. Diktet er i boka hennar, Byttingen, men eg tenkte å dela det med dykk her òg.

To mødre.

Du smiler mot meg
men armane dine ligg
som døde fuglar i fanget
verkande tomme.
Skulle vori born i dei
To små gutar
skulle dei famna
Sonene dine
som ikkje fekk leva.

Du smiler, vesle,
men sinnet ditt leitar
i lengt
etter dei små
leitar – langt bakom der
kor ingen kan nå -.
Men sjå ikkje på meg, barn
sjå ikkje på meg!
Augo dine brenn sår
i sjela mi –

• The cardiac risk of sexual activity, in patients How long does cialis last? functioning and 84% said they had never initiated a.

.
Sjå ikkje på meg -
augo dine
er hundre år – - .

Ikkje bruk diktet utan å spørra fyrst. Det er beskytta av Lov om opphavsrett

Eg er hudlaus no, midt i november. Men eg har vore her før. Eg veit det vert betre att snart.

Tags: , ,

123 Responses to “11/11”

  1. ~SerendipityCat~ Says:

    Det visste jeg ikke… sterkt… Tøft av deg å dele!

    ~SerendipityCat~s last blog post..Tilrettelagt for bloggere….

  2. Synnøve Says:

    Tenker mye på deg disse dagene.
    Varm klem…

  3. Hege Says:

    Klem

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  4. Ellen Says:

    Gode tanker sendes til deg, Ravn og Brage.

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  5. AnnetteK Says:

    Klem og gode tanker sendes over til deg.

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  6. Line Kristine Says:

    Hva skal man si? STERKT! Sender mange, varme, trøstetanker til deg!
    Nydelig dikt av moren din.

  7. Mari Says:

    Mange varme klemmer herifra.

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  8. Avil Says:

    Åh. Tenk at slikt nesten kan bli til å bere som åra går. At du kan fortelle om det, og halde orda ut. Eg sit her og tårene renn, og eg har djup respekt for det du har gått gjennom, og dit du er komme.
    Respekt.

    Avils last blog post..Hans tur

  9. Beate Gundersen Says:

    Tenker på deg. Og diktet som mammaen din har skrevet er sterkt og nydelig. Klem

  10. Pappa Says:

    Jeg har ikke skrevet noen kommentar før nå, for jeg vet ikke hva jeg skal si.
    Men jeg glemmer ikke den lille kista vi bar ut fra kirka. Ufattelig at det er
    åtte år siden. Fint dikt! Vi kjøpte forresten boka på Hokstad Samvirkelag
    for et par uker siden. Vi tenker på deg og dine.

  11. Lena Says:

    KLEM!

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  12. Anniken Says:

    Du værdn for ett dikt… Krokkodilletåran trilla..!

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